Jonny Deep

I don’t make any secret out of not liking cats. Cats are weird. All they do is use people. Everyone knows dogs are out to please us and cats are out to use us. When I get a pet it will be a dog. I used to live with cats and boy oh boy, do they suck.
But they sure do make some fine chinese food out of cats. So I guess I do like cats. They sure are tasty!
But you know, I’m just kidding. Eating cats is bad. Go look at this article on eating cats and dogs. That is some sick shit.

This is one of my favorite fantasies. I pull into some old west town on my black horse named Bobo and park him in front of the saloon. Then I go inside and order some whiskey. The bartender pous me a straight shot but doesn’t ask for any money.
Some tough guy comes over wearing a huge felt cowboy hat and sez ” Who the heck are you, stranger? You sure is ugly.”
I pull my trusty seven shooter and plug him full a lead, then drink my whiskey and walk out. Pure genius!
Here’s some good cowboy pics so you can see what I look like. Jeez am I cool!

Normally I wouldn’t tell strangers this kinda stuff, but what the hey.
It’s like this, see. I bought this bike off my neighbor. I only paid for part of it, then I moved. I never gave Bob the rest of the cash. I feel guilty, but a couple years are gone by and I haven’t talked to him.
I just got a new job, and guess who works there. Bob’s wife!
She just looks at me kinda funny. I wonder if she told anyone else at work.

This one’s a big, dark secret. Not a lot of people know how awesome Jonny Deep is. Stick around here and you’ll find out!
I got this sign from sign Generator Maker. Get yourself a hot sign!

I like to look around for funny stuff. I saw Miss Cellania today and had to smile.
This place is real good. There’s always some good jokes at Miss Cellania. You should go over there and get a good laugh. And don’t forget to say hi to that funny gal.

Hey, world. I’m Jonny Deep. I’m gonna let you in on some of my bestest, deepest darkest thoughts. Starting now.
I love perogies. I love the way you can fry em up and eat them right out of the pan. I love them with sour cream and bacon bits. Even fak’n bits. And don’t forget the chives. But the best is eating them for breakfast.
Come back laer. I’ll have more darkness for you.

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